Adam Lambert fans turn ugly!!

I guess it was inevitable really when you think about it. Adam let it be known he was returning more to his rock roots and like night follows day, the heavy duty rock fans have flocked to his gigs and changed the way we view glamberts forever!! Our illustrious fandom is no longer glam – it has been irrevocably changed – it seems – to THUGBERTS!!

At the recent Festival in Russia – we are told in an article and video from some Russian mob – that Adam’s fans were “ugly” and “threatened to bash people” – specifically all those nice Korn fans.  Some wanted to stand their ground and defend themselves against the hordes of Thugberts while a sad looking man with green hair and bad skin was so upset he spoke like a little boy and said “yeah well if… if …if they hit me I’ll hit Adam, I will, so there.” Thugberts turn grown men into frightened kiddies.

And of course whatserface – that Dozey Dill person – from the Examiner who’s always ready with her mouldy old rolling pin aimed squarely at Adam’s beautifully coiffed head – has jumped on the bandwagon and proclaimed to one and all the God’s Own Truth about how all those Adam Lambert fans turned ugly in Russia and Korn fans were “a-skerred” of them. Either that or the Korn fans were going to bash them back because they felt threatened. Or something like that – them Lambert fans were MEAN motherfuckers anyway

So, for those of us not really into bashing people, wreaking havoc and whatnot, does this mean we need to steer clear of Adam’s gigs in the future? Are we to take it that wherever Adam goes there will now be his hard core rock fans travelling with him ready to inflict untold pain and suffering on anyone who so much as looks at them funny???

We thought we’d better check it all out so we could learn to recognise who these ugly vicious meanies are in Adam’s fandom and that way we might be able to avoid getting our heads kicked in (and can warn fans of bands like The Prodigy and Korn to RUN when they see them – like their lives depended on it!!!)

And sadly, SHOCKINGLY – we found them. The violence and desperation, probably fuelled by a lifetime of alcoholism and drug-taking , all too clear in their beady blood-shot eyes. All the cliches are there, unkempt hair, wasted appearance, toothless grins, piercings up the wazoo and of course the crazy hair and eyes that look like death. These people would clearly kill ya soon as look at ya.

Here’s a prime example of one of these vicious thugs the Korn fans were so scared of.

Violent adam fan

 

OMG!!! Run for your lives. She may have an uzi under that cute cutout heart with a picture of Adam’s penis on it!!

 

 

 

Here’s a picture of another group of rampaging Adam fans beating a Korn fan to death with their balloons. You can’t see him but we saw footage of him and his mates being taken away in a glambulance shortly after this photo was taken.

beating with balloons

If you look carefully at this next pic you’ll see just how callous and inhuman these new breed of Lambert fans are. One of them is actually holding up a card with the number of Korn fans she’s killed written on it – a frightening EIGHT of them!!!

EIGHT victims!!!

And if that isn’t enough to convince you then take a look at THESE frightening faces – clearly they are all dirt-bag metal rock fans of Adam just itching to kick the shit out of some innocent and unsuspecting Prodigy and Korn sissys.

Killer Adam Lambert thugs en masse

And here some brave soul captured this shot of Adam’s Thugberts as they gathered in a Moscow square before the show to plan their evil rampage of violence against all other fandoms. Note the “hands in the air” on many of these scoundrels – we have it on good authority (some seedy looking Russian wanker with green hair & a nose ring told us) that this is a secret visual code meaning “kill the bastards”.

fans in square
Screaming hordes gather

Oh lord save us!!!

So Glammies!!! Are you suitably enlightened and forewarned now? What happens if, like me, you are a fan of Adam AND Korn AND The Prodigy? Do we have to choose sides? Will I have to play all sides and none? Can I be like a neutral Swedish (duh!) Swiss person and not join in the rock melee of chaos at all? And most of all, will any of this ruin our nail manicures?

Is this the story of the century or WHAT!!!? No wonder The Examiner lady couldn’t wait to get it up – er put it up on her bloggy thing.

nothing

 

 

42 thoughts on “Adam Lambert fans turn ugly!!

  1. I always thought we Glamberts were a kickass biker gang with rhinestone -bedazzled bikes, studded riding gloves and glitter spewing from our exhaust pipes. We are sweet Glam Angels until someone (maybe a certain writer) decides to mess with our BB. Even then we would follow Adam’s lead and kill ’em…with sparkly kindness.

  2. OMG!! Thank you for the much needed laughter today! I am proud to proclaim myself as a Thugbert and fortunately there is no cure! From Glambert to Thugbert in less than 60 seconds. Gotta go cut out some paper hearts and inflate some purple balloons cause I’m hearing the voice in the back of my head, “Let’s get ready to Rumble”. I ♥ Adam Lambert!!!! MWAH!!

  3. One*of*the*funniest*things*I*have*ever*read*!!!!

    Thank you,@soaked,for the witty (albeit,perrrrrfectly sarcastic) take on Adam Lambert and his….erm….army of glammicidal I-heart wielding, balloon launching lunatics!! Was there glitter? Perish the thought!! If loving Adam is wrong,I don’t want to be right…… I’ll take my place in the ‘Glambivilance’ line and get my number…..thank you very much. Thank goodness I wasn’t at the venue. I don’t know if I could have resisted the urge not to wave a perfectly shaped heart cut-out or burst a purple ‘A’ balloon in the face of the enemy. Oh my……those brave Korn and Prodigy fans who had to endure the wrath of the Adam Lambert ‘Thugberts’.

    Miss Jill should be experiencing some Thugbertery, right about now (and…well….she brought it on herself)!!

  4. That’s funny, but there’s no Thugbert, dude! True Adam’s fans only love, don’t hate, never can be thugs.
    Thanks 4 the nice pix of Russian Glamberts. They rock!!!

  5. What a laugh I had reading this one! Surely by now the whole World knows that Glamberts gather because of pure, simple love for each other and for Adam!

  6. Once a “Glambert” always a “Glambert” I will always love Adam Mitchell Lambert regardless and his music…<3

  7. I’m laughing uncontrollably. The one thing in that concocted ‘video story’ that was disappointing was Korn’s lead singer NOT setting the reporters straight immediately by mentioning that their band members have performed with Adam and that everyone in the music scene acknowledges his amazing vocal chops.

  8. Thanks for the biggest laugh of my day, in fact still laughing while I type… I was wondering why I recently started to wear all black and re-positioned all of my body glitter to my knuckles…. Ah these must be the first signs of my transformation into Thugberting… defined as those who scare by means of kiss-in, hug-in and constant shouting of deem fighting words such as love, joy and happiness. In my perfect world all fandom’s will convert to Thugberting and it’s outward displays of human-kindness… oh save the children from this future and let it be so! A proud Thugbert forever LOL

  9. OH. MY. GOD. this piece is freaking hilarious! Hope JJ reads it – “NATIONAL CELEBRITY HEADLINES the Examiner!” Jouranlism at it’s finest!
    Poor JJ – she doesn’t realize that you’re supposed to shit from your butt – NOT your mouth. 🙂
    2 words JJ – FACT CHECK. lol! doesn’t she know what happens when you rile up us Thugberts??????
    Thanks so much for the HaHaHas!

  10. Great blog – funny yet well-documented with pictures and everything, unlike that purveyor of untruths to whom you refer. Oh yeah, those Thugberts are really scary (NOT). I bet those hearts are really lethal weapons they used to inflict nasty papercuts on the Korn fans. I bet the plan was to cut ’em up and leave ’em whining and bleeding, then walk callously away without even offering a Bandaid or a kissy to make it better. Scary and sneaky little bitches those Thugberts!

  11. Yes the Adam fans are a wicked crew no doubt about it!! It seems that every rock snob over the age of 38 and pushing into the 40s feels a need to combat this evil breed and they share it with their young’ns. Can’t imagine how one such gorgeous, talented man has created such a stir, but “rock on” ole ye cruel fans of this frightening artist. Perhaps the rock snobs can regain their faith and stick a thumb in it very soon and just realize – the dude has massive talent!!!

  12. It’s the first time I’m visiting this site and just gotta say, whoever wrote this post is just too cute and funny. It certainly takes the bad taste from the other article (yes unfortunately, I happen to have read the one from “Dozey Dill”) away from my mouth. You guys are great, I’ll try and keep making regular visits.

    1. Oh dear! Now I feel pressured…. what if that was a one off? What if I’m never funny again? What if I disappoint all those millions of (well, thousands… ok…. hundreds….FINE! 2 or 3) people who now plan to revisit this site? Oh the strain!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :Wink: Thanks – I’m glad I could improve the taste in your mouth – I know how bad it was!!

  13. All jokings aside, I think the Russian glamberts are the bravest fans there that day. They braved hard-rock (I assume Korn & whatsis are hard-rock) fans of other acts to see and support Adam. Bravo <33

  14. Change Sweden to neutral Switzerland, and this’ll be a perfect article 😀 Killer teen Glammies. Horrible :/

    1. Ahhh – LMAO – you are right of course. I must be losing my capacity to think… first signs of Thugbertism….

  15. The only time a Glambert becomes a Thugbert is if you mess with our BB. Adam’s message is all about love so if that somehow translates into media-speak for hate…they’re as wacko as ever. Hey folks, let’s just chill. NOH8

  16. LOL!!!! This has got to be the best (or shall I say most stupid thing yet). Your portrayal of this article is fantastic!!
    Glambert476…..make love not war

    ADAM ROCKS MY WORLD (ROCK & SEX GOD)!!!
    ADAM IS PURE PERFECTION!!!

  17. This is hilarious! OMG! Was there an article for real? One thing Adam fans have not been called before! Yeah we’re all a BIG threat (sorta kinda true if you mess with our Adam Mitchell Lambert)! May everyone now be for warned!!! LMAO!!! You are very humorous in the way you write! Enjoyed a lot!!

    1. @Bev – sad to say yes, once again the Pulitzer Prize winning *snort* Jody Jill strikes again with an Adam/Glamthug bashing article in the NY Times err, make that the Examiner.

      1. @kms, whenever I see two names “Jodie Jill” and “Adam Lambert” together I know that I’m in for sophisticated and well researched piece of journalism.
        You’re right – Jodie is just one tiny step away from Pulitzer.
        Thank you for making me laugh!

  18. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!! ahem.

  19. @feral:u r a riot!!(get it get it???!!!;-))) i was laughing so hard tears rolled down my face…and now,being a Glambert,ill go back to my usual occupation of killing puppies while listening to GN live!

  20. Have always considered myself a glambert but after reading this epistle
    I can think of several grown-ups (?) I’d love to skerrrr so maybe I should be a thugbert. Nah – guess I’ll stay a peace-loving glambert and give the thumbs down to these desperate headline-seeking journos.
    It’s the latter who are skerrred because glamberts make love.. not war.

  21. Ohhhh I’m skerrrrred.

    Haa haaa, well just goes to show the gutter journalist’s out there only write those crappy idiotic stories so they can get hit’s.
    The truth has been revealed, Adam Lambert fans are not thug’s, just the opposite.
    They Love, they don’t hate.

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